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I suppose I should update, since I haven't really updated in a while. I was reading some old xanga posts Monday, and it made me wish I'd written more this year than I had. Even in what I thought were boring accounts of my daily life, I found some lovely, hilarious descriptions (if I may preen a bit ... forgive my vanity, please) that I may find use for some day. I may yet return to the time when to leave off an entry for a few days seemed strange.
What has been happening? Interim. I've decided that, excepting the early mornings which make late nights unbearable, I enjoy interim a lot. The chance to focus on just one subject (which happens to be my major), to do only the homework load of one class (even if I have that class three hours everyday) and to spend class time discussing stories (which is sometimes frustrating but more often than not fine) is really a high point in my school year. I feel much more relaxed than I did during Christmas break, even if I still can't sleep in or stay up late. I have things to do, certainly, but the pressure that weighs me down during the semesters is missing. I don't even find myself procrastinating (much).
Of course, interim can be just as awful as it can be wonderful; I won't deny that. Interim was so-so last year, though I had a good prof. This year I have already (I shouldn't say already; I only have a week left of interim) latched on to two authors who I had never heard of before--Tim Gautreaux and Doris Betts. Both have a snappy writing style and wonderful characters, and I will certainly seek out more from them.
Monday was a momentous day for me (but not necessarily for anyone else, other than being MLK day if I recall correctly) for two reasons.
First of all, I finished up the final case of Phoenix Wright: Attorney at Law. This was no surprise since I had been playing it quite often since I got it not so long ago. I was overall very pleased with it; the cases were awfully twisty, but the characters and dialogue were irresistable, and I got many a laugh out of them. Also, though it is not necessarily a hard game, it was very fulfilling to me each time I figured something out that I could use (sometimes long before I could talk about it in court). On a stupider note, I adore Edgeworth and his silly court mannerisms. I am going to buy the sequel once I find it.
Second, I finished Kare Kano. While I have only been playing PW for a few weeks, I have been collecting and reading volumes of Kare Kano for years. It was the first manga I started collecting, in fact, way back when I was in my first or second year of high school. Though it began as a simple romantic comedy with two quirky, intelligent protagonists, Masami Tsuda introduced new character after new character, blessing each one with his or her own unique story and exquisitely developing each personality. The story never got tired or old because she never relied on the cliches of shoujo manga, opting instead for back story, familial drama, and personal introspection. Yes, there were weak moments, and some characters were stronger than others. I still feel Kare Kano rises formidably above much of the shoujo manga out there with its clean art and generally good prose (the translation is one of Tokyopop's better ones). It's one manga that I don't regret taking a chance on, even after 21 volumes.
For some reason, I haven't found myself buying as much manga lately. The market is so saturated that I've become wary of the quality of all the titles I haven't heard of (because frankly, a whole lot of crap comes through with the good stuff). It also seems like the few titles I am interested in are the few titles that my local Waldenbooks doesn't carry. Pfft. I'm not yet ready to swallow my pride and order online (I'm waiting for a sale, because I get coupons from Walden x.x). I still haven't used my Borders Rewards money yet, though, so I'll have to figure out something to buy before the end of the month. I really should've used it on Kare Kano, I know, but I have this strange romantic notion of rewarding myself as close to my birthday as I can get, which means saving it for another week and a half. It shouldn't be hard, though. Just because I haven't been buying lately doesn't mean there aren't a number of series that I've been half-heartedly following (e.g., Bleach, Nana) or feel like I really *should* finish (Suikoden is finally over at 11 volumes ...).
(Is this stuff you really care to read about? Is this stuff that really matters to me? Ah, well, at least in another few years when I can't remember what kind of person I was in college I can look back and say, "Oh, I was a materialistic otaku. Okay.")
I can't think of anything more meaningful to say.
Girls keep moving off my floor. The latest to leave says she hates it here, though she doesn't hate the people. What is a dorm floor but the people, really? I don't understand, though sometimes I wonder if I would be happier if I hadn't chosen to live here again this year. I look at people around me who seem to be having more fun and feel jealous. But I don't hate it here, and somehow I think that nothing would be different no matter what dorm or floor I lived on. I would still spend more time than I should with my door closed, my posture awful as I bend over the computer for hours at a time. I would still feel unable to connect to those who lived just down the hall last year at the floor reunion I attended Saturday night. I would still shyly stick to my roommate's side until she left me for wider company at dorm events, not meaning any harm by her unintentional abandonment. Nothing would change but the proximity of the morgue and the laundry room.
Oh, that sounds too depressing. The point is simply that the things I wish for are within my reach; I just do not reach to grab them, or I don't know how, or I don't hold tight enough when I do. I wondered when I was newly graduated if I could survive in the world as I was. I still don't know (there's no way to test it), but I do think I'm changing, growing up in some ways if not in others. That's okay. I'm not there yet.
I'm not there yet.
What has been happening? Interim. I've decided that, excepting the early mornings which make late nights unbearable, I enjoy interim a lot. The chance to focus on just one subject (which happens to be my major), to do only the homework load of one class (even if I have that class three hours everyday) and to spend class time discussing stories (which is sometimes frustrating but more often than not fine) is really a high point in my school year. I feel much more relaxed than I did during Christmas break, even if I still can't sleep in or stay up late. I have things to do, certainly, but the pressure that weighs me down during the semesters is missing. I don't even find myself procrastinating (much).
Of course, interim can be just as awful as it can be wonderful; I won't deny that. Interim was so-so last year, though I had a good prof. This year I have already (I shouldn't say already; I only have a week left of interim) latched on to two authors who I had never heard of before--Tim Gautreaux and Doris Betts. Both have a snappy writing style and wonderful characters, and I will certainly seek out more from them.
Monday was a momentous day for me (but not necessarily for anyone else, other than being MLK day if I recall correctly) for two reasons.
First of all, I finished up the final case of Phoenix Wright: Attorney at Law. This was no surprise since I had been playing it quite often since I got it not so long ago. I was overall very pleased with it; the cases were awfully twisty, but the characters and dialogue were irresistable, and I got many a laugh out of them. Also, though it is not necessarily a hard game, it was very fulfilling to me each time I figured something out that I could use (sometimes long before I could talk about it in court). On a stupider note, I adore Edgeworth and his silly court mannerisms. I am going to buy the sequel once I find it.
Second, I finished Kare Kano. While I have only been playing PW for a few weeks, I have been collecting and reading volumes of Kare Kano for years. It was the first manga I started collecting, in fact, way back when I was in my first or second year of high school. Though it began as a simple romantic comedy with two quirky, intelligent protagonists, Masami Tsuda introduced new character after new character, blessing each one with his or her own unique story and exquisitely developing each personality. The story never got tired or old because she never relied on the cliches of shoujo manga, opting instead for back story, familial drama, and personal introspection. Yes, there were weak moments, and some characters were stronger than others. I still feel Kare Kano rises formidably above much of the shoujo manga out there with its clean art and generally good prose (the translation is one of Tokyopop's better ones). It's one manga that I don't regret taking a chance on, even after 21 volumes.
For some reason, I haven't found myself buying as much manga lately. The market is so saturated that I've become wary of the quality of all the titles I haven't heard of (because frankly, a whole lot of crap comes through with the good stuff). It also seems like the few titles I am interested in are the few titles that my local Waldenbooks doesn't carry. Pfft. I'm not yet ready to swallow my pride and order online (I'm waiting for a sale, because I get coupons from Walden x.x). I still haven't used my Borders Rewards money yet, though, so I'll have to figure out something to buy before the end of the month. I really should've used it on Kare Kano, I know, but I have this strange romantic notion of rewarding myself as close to my birthday as I can get, which means saving it for another week and a half. It shouldn't be hard, though. Just because I haven't been buying lately doesn't mean there aren't a number of series that I've been half-heartedly following (e.g., Bleach, Nana) or feel like I really *should* finish (Suikoden is finally over at 11 volumes ...).
(Is this stuff you really care to read about? Is this stuff that really matters to me? Ah, well, at least in another few years when I can't remember what kind of person I was in college I can look back and say, "Oh, I was a materialistic otaku. Okay.")
I can't think of anything more meaningful to say.
Girls keep moving off my floor. The latest to leave says she hates it here, though she doesn't hate the people. What is a dorm floor but the people, really? I don't understand, though sometimes I wonder if I would be happier if I hadn't chosen to live here again this year. I look at people around me who seem to be having more fun and feel jealous. But I don't hate it here, and somehow I think that nothing would be different no matter what dorm or floor I lived on. I would still spend more time than I should with my door closed, my posture awful as I bend over the computer for hours at a time. I would still feel unable to connect to those who lived just down the hall last year at the floor reunion I attended Saturday night. I would still shyly stick to my roommate's side until she left me for wider company at dorm events, not meaning any harm by her unintentional abandonment. Nothing would change but the proximity of the morgue and the laundry room.
Oh, that sounds too depressing. The point is simply that the things I wish for are within my reach; I just do not reach to grab them, or I don't know how, or I don't hold tight enough when I do. I wondered when I was newly graduated if I could survive in the world as I was. I still don't know (there's no way to test it), but I do think I'm changing, growing up in some ways if not in others. That's okay. I'm not there yet.
I'm not there yet.
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